2008-11-03

Big Ones Over the Hill

Over the Hill

I've come to the realization that I might be over the hill. My nephews say that I'm outta touch, and my friends are saying that they are surprised that I don't go out and party. Yes folks, Man-O-Pause has hit the big one.

Today I got the biggest surprise, my female monthly arrived without notice. Or maybe it's just that mother nature hasn't given me such as a hint since July that breast swelling, cramps and irritability seems like "Just another day"

I didn't crave chocolate nor men and I'm just wondering will the hormones ever recover from abstaining. At this point I'm just tired of making advances to men who when they look at me ignore and miff me as if my deodorant wasn't working. Funny how you could tell that most men would "F" you if they had the opportunity. It's the relationship thing that they're running from. And I think that I must reek with the "Marry Me" syndrome.

Suffering from commitment-itus, I just keep smiling and having a good time with life. Even though my horny toad ribbits make men croak with OMG look at the size of those teets. I'm still going to the gym 2-3 times a week... Ok ok... maybe 2ce. My diet is getting better and I'm drinking more water.

Tonight I'm going over Dad's for dinner and BBQ. Tomorrow the gym to gloat at the cutie pie gays. They are such hunks and love to display muscles. It kinda takes away the "No One Paying Attention to Me" for a date. However gays do love to kiss and I kiss lots of them on the cheek. Some of the most handsome ones who love to think it still might be possible that women find them attractive syndrome. I don't really care, as I get to slap one on the butt every now and then, smooth my hands over a muscle shirt and sigh at the very thought of me never having a chance. They give me encouraging words to visit the gym more often. I think gays like big boobs too.

At least now that I'm over the hill I don't have to look back and think I can't be the pied piper of any man who likes staring at big ones.

Hugz n Lub, Bebe da FairyGodMum