September 11, 2007

Happy Anniversary.. yeah right ... BS

DeJaVu

Seems like it was the same time last year. Ahhh YEaHsss... I remember it well.

I was just about to begin a New Job... at Big Retailer. 9/11 yes it was, the falling of the towers and innocent bystanders anniversary. Not a good sign, so to speak in metaphysical terms. I walked in the joint and nobody knew who I was or why I was there.

Here I am one year later the complete anniversary of my should be one year celebration and I errrrrr handed uhhh tried to hand the keys to the store to the Bleep ditty Bleep Store Manager. Well, the keys slipped from my hands as he was angrily telling me off about how bad the store looked last night. Shee'sh it was Sunday! Madness Sunday with Goo Goobs of kids riding bikes, roller skating and knocking boxes off the shelves since of course Everything was 30-50% OFF! Oh yes.. the BIG Sale before inventory.

So, there I was listing to his yelling at me, when I handed him the keys to the store and said HERE! He looked at the keys and looked at me bitterly not reaching for the keys... but the keys slipped from my hand and well... fell to the ground. KERPLINK.. Chingle.. Chingle!!! Right at his feet!

We both looked at each other, he picked them up and walked inside the store NOT saying a word. I watched him and well... walked away back to my car for the LONG Drive home. Yes back 50 miles across the Bay Bridge and to hopefully find a parking place near my home. SheeeeIT. I think I just QUIT? HOLY MOLEY! Uhhhh I didn't say... it but I got the distinct feeling in the pit of my stomach the ordeal was OVER!!! YIPPPIEEEEEEEE I'm OUTTA HERE!

They tried to put the disaster of the department on me. Well, the department was already in such a Big Freakin Mess there was NO WAY Little Ole Me could fix it alone. Oh did I say there were people to help? Well... no one.. but NO ONE would help me. They would either show up to work drunk, or refuse to do the work, or not show up to work at all! Then I'd have to fix everything IMPOSSIBLE by myself. So..

I feel so RELIEVED!!!!!

We were about to go into inventory on the 13th.. hehehe... Lucky 13 ehhh? This store manager... gets to work, does a few phone conference calls, neither convey's what the meetings were about to the managers, surfs the internet looking at sports scores, nude women, chats on the phone with his secret lovahhh and leaves early... lets just say he's outta there by 1 or 2pm. His wifee calls, he's NOT THERE hehehee.

He has barely a clue as to what is going on in the store. The stockroom is a complete mess. The inventory clerk came into the store and said what the FRUCK are you doing here? YOU ARE NOT READY! Hell NO he ain't ready shoulda been ready 3 months ago, but what was he doing???? Take a guess? He doesn't manage the store and he's making over 120k. I could do a better job than this. The horrible woman he has put in complete confidance never does what she's supposed to. She sabotages all the other managers, trying to make everyone look bad frucks up the entire store. She always praises herself and her accomplishments. Meanwhile... she leaves a mess for everyone to pick up behind her. Then she blames them for the mess when its her.

Can you tell I really LOVED This Job?

The customers were dynamite! NO REALLY they were explosive! Had this one guy who was 6'4 come in a try to bully me into giving him a boom box. Then right after that another humunguous nimbicile comes in and starts shouting at me because he's bothering the associates. He loiters chatting trying to pick up and visually molest the women. Then later a woman curses me out because the internet wasn't working on 3 computers. That's another story, we had a blackout a few weeks ago that destroyed our computer system, our phone lines, the circuit connectors for our radio hand held controllers, lets just say. I think the Store Manager wanted me GONE. He needed the MONEY so who goes first. The LAST HIRED.

Well.. ADIOS AMIGOS

I will miss the wonderful employees whom I made friends with. Such really kewl people. Sincere hearted and generous. REAL People work Hard for the MONEY to survive. Aliens don't give a fruck and abuse people, lie cheat and steal to make you look bad.

IDIOTS will burn in Hell.. I tell ya HELL!

My prediction, Big Retailer will go out of business by January/February. Inventory results and 2007 will be well remembered as the year we had fun while it lasted, made the best of a poor, lousy, yes even BAD situation. Cried, laughed and gave each other Lots of Hugs.

I'm Lookin for a Nee Newww Job Baybayyy a NEEwww JOB Baybeee.. Yeah Yeah Yeahhh (Sing to Jody Whatley's I'm Lookin for a New Love Baybee)

BTW, found out Older Than Dirt was married so I said Thanks but No Thanks. Good thing I kept my virtue intact! Probaby couldn't get it up anyways.. hehehe

Hugz n Lub, Bebe da FairyGodMum